Any self-respecting cow understands how it is. Sometimes, you just want to chill in the barn with your chicken friends.
That outdoor sun gets pretty scorching, you know. It’s tough, weighing somewhere in the neighborhood of 1,400 pounds and trying to keep your cool.
And a cow’s poultry posse just seems to get it. Every day, those frazzled fowl are forced to hang out in humble coops; fret about egg production; even scramble through the dirt pursued by high-strung kindergarteners who clearly need a time-out in the corner.
So yeah, cows and chickens share that unspoken communication. It’s soothing, just standing there in the shade — silently strutting your stuff, shaking dust off your feathers, sharing a few “moo-ving” opinions about the state of the world.
That’s why maybe you can imagine the sense of utter shock.
You’re hanging out with your hen friends one afternoon, minding your own business, when suddenly some wise guy wanders up out of nowhere.
I mean, he just stands there like he owns the place. You’re not expecting anything like it — those fluffy feathers, the sharp-looking talons, that bizarre waddle under his beak.
And seriously, why the attitude? He’s already twice as big as the other capons in the crowd, so he doesn’t need to act like some sort of barnyard celebrity.
Okay, there’s Thanksgiving. True, this guy is the star of the Thanksgiving holiday — but does he really even comprehend what that means?
I hate to break this to him, but it involves an oven and a platter. His part in Thanksgiving brings a whole new meaning to the term “being served.”
A cow encountering a turkey for the first time is the best thing you’re gonna see today ??❤ pic.twitter.com/Anw3DkzTiV
— david ⓥ (@VeganGenesis) March 11, 2018
My point is, most people would forgive the average cow for being a little unnerved when this gigantic bird crashes the party.
I don’t understand why some humans would describe the reaction as “intimidated,” “comically terrified,” and “totally panic-stricken.”
You know, I really do miss those long-ago days of early agriculture. They helped make our country into the great nation it is today — and way back then, there was no such thing as video evidence.
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