Sharing loss is an intimate form of solidarity, and the more people acknowledge and process their grief openly, the more accepted it will become. Many people feel a sense of shame regarding miscarriage: There’s not only a deep sorrow over the loss but a sense of responsibility that women can struggle with.
Meghan McCain joined those women who, seeing the need for change, have come forward with their own uniquely painful stories in order to reassure others in the same situation that it’s not their fault, and that it’s okay to work through grief at your own speed.
She wrote a piece for the New York Times that was shared on Twitter in July 2019, detailing her loss.
Even though she seemed fine on the outside, she said that she can look at photos from that time and “see a woman hiding her shock and sorrow.”
“I am posed for the camera, looking stern and strong, representing my fellow conservative women across the country,” she wrote. “But inside, I am dying. Inside, my baby is dying.”
Like many mothers, she found herself personally at fault for the miscarriage.
“I blamed my age, I blamed my personality,” she explained. “I blamed everything and anything a person could think of. This, I told myself, is the reason my body is a rock-strewn wasteland in which no child may live.”
“My miscarriage was a horrendous experience and I would not wish it upon anyone. I loved my baby, and I always will.”
“I have love for all the women who, like me, were briefly in the sisterhood of motherhood, hoping, praying and nursing joy within us, until the day the joy was over,” she added. “You are not alone.”
“I had a miscarriage,” writes @meghanmccain. “I loved my baby, and I always will. To the end of my days I will remember this child — and whatever children come will not obscure that.” https://t.co/ks8ur8FUK8
— New York Times Opinion (@nytopinion) July 19, 2019
But on March 22, McCain announced some exciting news across her social media platforms.
“My husband Ben and I have been blessed to find out I’m pregnant,” she shared. “Although this isn’t how I expected to announce my pregnancy, both we and our families are excited to share the news with you all.”
“I consulted with my doctors and they advised me that for the safety of our baby and myself, I should be extra vigilant about limiting the amount of people we come in contact with. Starting immediately, I’ll be joining the millions of Americans who are self-isolating as a precaution to prevent the spread of COVID-19. As a result, I will be appearing on ‘The View’ from home via satellite.”
“I’m fortunate that my employer, ABC, has allowed me and my co-hosts to work remotely. I am indebted to our producers and crew. I also want to acknowledge the heroes — the doctors, nurses, grocery and pharmacy workers, journalists, police officers, firemen and military — who are on the front lines of this fight.”
“Please stay safe. Wash your hands and avoid public gatherings and I will continue to see you each morning on ‘The View.'”
McCain is in the same boat as so many other families right now, working from home.
Hopefully this quarantine will keep her safe as she works and as she and her husband prepare to welcome this long-awaited child into their arms.
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