Trump Campaign Flips Dorian Criticisms, Sells Black Pen with 'Special Ability' To Drive CNN 'Crazy'


President Donald Trump blew a big kiss to his adoring fans in the left-wing establishment media once again this week, turning their latest criticism into yet another successful gag product for his campaign to sell.

This time, the product is a fine-point sharpie marker with the magical ability “to drive @CNN and the rest of the fake news crazy,” the Daily Caller reported.

The product announcement comes in light of mass media outrage over, of all things, a map the president held up to reporters Thursday during an Oval Office news briefing on Hurricane Dorian.

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Trump had tweeted a warning Sunday to the American people as Dorian, which did tremendous damage to the Bahamas over the weekend, prepared to make landfall on the United States east coast.

In his post, the president mentioned parts of southeast Alabama were potentially at risk, despite many best estimates at the time not placing the state in the storm’s five-day “cone of uncertainty.” Trump and his aides seemed to double down on the claim when he held up his outdated map — complete with what appeared to be a black line drawn on with a sharpie.

Establishment media heads, namely those at CNN, quickly flew off the handle, calling Trump a science denier, accusing him of deliberate attempts at misinformation and saying he “jumped the sharpie” by including Alabama on the storm’s projected track.

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In response, the president’s campaign did what it does best and doubled down again in hopes of sending the liberal media even further up a wall.

“Buy the official Trump marker,” Trump campaign manager Brad Parscale tweeted, “which is different than every other marker on the market, because this one has the special ability to drive @CNN and the rest of the fake news crazy!”

Parscale and his team are no strangers to this strategy, bringing in $200,000 this July selling Trump brand plastic straws.

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The straw, released as a slew of Democrats nationwide began demanding that American businesses and individuals begin using environmentally friendly paper straws, was of course released with a similar punchy claim: that “liberal paper straws don’t work.”

According to Parscale, the new pens are just as popular, with “hundreds of sets” sold in the span of a few hours.

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Andrew J. Sciascia was the supervising editor of features at The Western Journal. Having joined up as a regular contributor of opinion in 2018, he went on to cover the Barrett confirmation and 2020 presidential election for the outlet, regularly co-hosting its video podcast, "WJ Live," as well.
Andrew J. Sciascia was the supervising editor of features at The Western Journal and regularly co-hosted the outlet's video podcast, "WJ Live."

Sciascia first joined up with The Western Journal as a regular contributor of opinion in 2018, before graduating with a degree in criminal justice and political science from the University of Massachusetts Lowell, where he served as editor-in-chief of the student newspaper and worked briefly as a political operative with the Massachusetts Republican Party.

He covered the Barrett confirmation and 2020 presidential election for The Western Journal. His work has also appeared in The Daily Caller.