I hate geese without qualification or emendation. See, when I was a kid growing up in Kentucky, I’d regularly visit a nearby neighbor’s farm, and they had the most evil-tempered waterfowl my young self could imagine.
Without provocation, this bird would snap at your arms and legs and (ahem) more sensitive bits of anatomy. And to judge from recent reports coming out of DeBary, Florida, I’m not the only one who has had to deal with such a mean-spirited bird.
Residents of this Central Florida community that lies just north of Orlando have found themselves facing one nasty goose. In the neighborhood around Green Reed Road, families have taken to going indoors when the bird appears.
Why? Apparently, the animal has taken to attacking children. “He usually follows the kids home from the bus stop or he tries to attack everyone who is at the bus stop,” resident Jennifer Gesule told WKMG.
The bird has also embarked on a career of property damage. Homeowner Leah Jones Digges decided to whip out her cell phone when she saw the goose appear in a neighbor’s backyard.
While she recorded, the goose stamped around the grassy area, honking and menacingly approached Digges. It had already torn out a screen on the neighbor’s door and broken a window.
“He’s also broken several windows,” Digges said. “You can’t even sit out in your yard in peace anymore because of this guy.”
Gesule explained that the goose hadn’t always been so nasty. “He had a friend and then the friend passed,” she said.
“I don’t know what happened with the friend. But his friend died and that’s when the goose went a little bit crazy.”
A bit of basic goose biology might explain the situation. See, most geese mate for life.
While their mate lives, geese stay monogamous. They may find another partner after their first dies, but it isn’t an automatic process.
So while the residents living along Green Reed Road in DeBary might dislike their grumpy feathered neighbor, perhaps they should feel just the tiniest pang of sympathy for it.
It could be that the marauder is simply suffering from a broken heart.
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