Ex-NYT Reporter Wants To Beat Anti-Maskers to Death, So Actor Nick Searcy Makes Him an Offer


A few years ago, when someone said something cretinous on Twitter, the en vogue response was to tell the person: “Delete your account.”

That person wasn’t going to, of course, and no one was under the misapprehension the subject of their ire was going to go into their settings and deactivate it in contrite abnegation. Before the phrase became overused and was trotted out at the slightest provocation, it was an effective way of telling someone their online behavior was noxious.

I’m bringing the phrase back today not as a retort, but as a heartfelt plea to left-wing journalist Kurt Eichenwald: Delete your account. Please.

It’s not for my sake. In fact, you’ve actually blocked me — and since I don’t recall ever making a comment about you or on one of your posts on social media, I can only assume it’s because a) I’ve written about your strange habits on and off of Twitter and/or b) you just block any published conservative, no matter how insignificant. (And trust me, I am.)

Rather, it’s for your sake. We’ll get into your history of social media self-owns in a little bit, but let’s talk about what happened this week and why it could end up with you and actor Nick Searcy in a fight to the death over mask-wearing, should you actually go through with your own rhetoric.

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You’re a big believer in masks, as I can tell by the fact your Twitter name is “Kurt ‘Masks Save Lives’ Eichenwald.” (I’m assuming this wasn’t a legal change.) As it turns out, I’m a believer in masks, too. Aside from when I’ve eaten in restaurants, I can’t think of any time in the past nine months or so where I’ve been in an enclosed public place without one.

When I see someone without a mask in an enclosed public place, however, I try to keep in mind these interactions likely aren’t where COVID transmission usually happens, judging by the meager body of scientific study we have to go on. I also think private businesses and other enclosed public spaces should be able to say whether or not you have to wear a mask — and if they say you do, they have every right to eject patrons who don’t. If they say you don’t have to wear a mask, I have every right not to patronize that business or enter that public space.

You, Mr. Eichenwald — a journalist formerly with The New York Times, Vanity Fair and Newsweek, as well as a bestselling author — have a different approach to those who don’t don masks. You keep Immanuel Kant’s categorical imperative in mind when you think about anti-maskers, because it gives you the moral right to search one out and beat them to death. You feel this way because those “antimaskers” supposedly gave your sister, already widowed by COVID-19, the novel coronavirus.

Not only that, you felt this was all an appropriate thought string of thoughts to share with the world, at least for a brief period.

First, let me start with your tweet that’s still up about your sister and how you believe she contracted COVID-19:

Your tweet blamed Missouri GOP Sen. Josh Hawley directly. While Hawley has gone maskless in the past, he also introduced legislation to secure the U.S. supply chain for surgical masks, personal protective equipment and other relevant medications early in the coronavirus crisis, making him an interesting target.

Maybe this has to do with his concerns about the election. Nevertheless, I’m truly sorry for your circumstances, although I’m curious how you deduced your sister “has Covid because of antimaskers.”

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However, I’m more concerned about this Wednesday eve tweet from you, apparently removed by Twitter for violating its rules.

For those of you listening in who don’t want to get caught in the complicated web that is Kant’s categorical imperative, here’s how Kant himself summed it up: “Act only according to that maxim by which you can at the same time will that it should become a universal law.”

Thus, if someone won’t wear a mask, they’re not against killing. Which means Kurt Eichenwald can hunt them down and kill them. Sounds legit.

Actor Nick Searcy from “Justified” — a Hollywood conservative more than willing to stand in as a representative for the anti-masker contingent — offered himself up:

I don’t know if you’ve ever watched “Justified,” Mr. Eichenwald. I have and I’ve seen you on TV. Searcy played U.S. Marshal Art Mullen, and was thoroughly believable as a U.S. Marshal. I don’t think searching out Nick Searcy and trying to kill him will end well for you.

You quickly made it clear you weren’t going to search those anti-mask people out and kill them, you just hope they died a horrible death.

WARNING: Some of the following tweets contain vulgar language that some viewers will find offensive.

We all have bad nights. However, you’ve had a bad run on social media, and it’s not just because of this:

Yes, I get it. That hasn’t aged well. The problem is you have a bad run on Twitter going back years.

In 2017, you posted this picture of an anti-Semitic threat you allegedly received.

Unfortunately, you’d forgotten to close an anime porn page tab on your computer:

Your excuse was that you were showing it to your family:

This summer, you tweeted that you were ashamed our first lady “is a foreigner” after Melania Trump’s renovation of the White House Rose Garden, although you later said your “complex point” may have been “misunderstood” as xenophobic, according to the Daily Mail.

There was also that time in 2018 where you insulted Parkland shooting survivor Kyle Kashuv and then claimed you mixed him up with someone else. (You also wrote a letter to Ben Shapiro asking for Kashuv to be psychologically evaluated.)

You called Joe Biden sexual assault accuser Tara Reade a “liar” who should be given a “perp walk for filing a false police report” and “[r]ot in hell” in a 32-part tweetstorm:

Kurt, please. I’m not saying this as an insult. I’m saying this as a plea, both for whatever remains of your reputation and your sanity: Delete your account. Really. Before you have to deal with Nick Searcy.

On the other hand, if you want to go through with this, I think there would be a lot of people who’d pay to see it. If you could unblock me from your Twitter account before this happens, I’d appreciate it. Thanks in advance.

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C. Douglas Golden is a writer who splits his time between the United States and Southeast Asia. Specializing in political commentary and world affairs, he's written for Conservative Tribune and The Western Journal since 2014.
C. Douglas Golden is a writer who splits his time between the United States and Southeast Asia. Specializing in political commentary and world affairs, he's written for Conservative Tribune and The Western Journal since 2014. Aside from politics, he enjoys spending time with his wife, literature (especially British comic novels and modern Japanese lit), indie rock, coffee, Formula One and football (of both American and world varieties).
Morristown, New Jersey
Catholic University of America
Languages Spoken
English, Spanish
Topics of Expertise
American Politics, World Politics, Culture