'Underage': Rep. Luna Has Seen the Swalwell Footage, Now She's Using the Word Swalwell Most Feared
I hope your weekend was better than Eric Swalwell’s. But if it was, you’re alive, and not so badly injured that you couldn’t be reading this. So it was.
Congratulations on not being a sex pervert who went from California gubernatorial frontrunner on Thursday to resigning from of Congress Monday night and not in the running for anything but an orange jumpsuit. (California governor’s mansion is definitely out, though.)
And, let me tell you, it couldn’t happen to a better person. I don’t mean this to be flippant: Not only was Swalwell a smug, unserious troll, he was also a serial pervert whose depredations were ignored by the media until activists forced them to cover it.
Even the people who ignored the fact that, five-plus years ago, he was sexually linked with a Chinese spy couldn’t ignore multiple women accusing him of sexual abuse and other forms of misconduct, plus video of him, ahem, misbehaving seriously with another woman while he was apparently very married.
But wait, it could get worse. Because, according to Rep. Anna Paulina Luna of Florida, she’s been briefed that the person who recorded the footage of Swalwell misbehaving is the worst word the congressman wants to hear right now: “underage.”
During an appearance on Fox News last night, the GOP congresswoman said she’d been briefed that not only was the video real and not AI-generated but that the person who recorded it was not of age.
For those of you who haven’t seen it, we’re not going to post it; it’s not profoundly explicit — heck, these days, it probably wouldn’t even merit an R rating — but it was pretty clear that whatever was happening was going toward X-rated territory fast.
Basically, the short clip, reportedly either taken in Swalwell’s current home or a hotel, shows him on the bed with another unidentified man and woman who the original source claims is a sex worker. She is dressed at the time — as is everyone in the short clip — and Swalwell grabs her face and directs it toward his for a sloppy kiss. It looks like the cleanest part of a video from Hunter Biden’s laptop. (As an aside: How much you want to bet those two exchanged tips on picking up women?)
While everyone is fully clothed and the clip is indeed short, let’s just say that, one, we all see where this is going and two, at least Swalwell and the sex worker don’t come across as, shall we say, people who should be operating a motor vehicle at the time it was taken. Perhaps it’s just clumsiness, but this is somewhat pertinent because Swalwell’s accusers paint a consistent picture of him as a man who would get them too inebriated to consent to sex and then force himself upon them.
So, there are three people on the bed and one recording in Swalwell’s house. Perhaps the one recording is Swalwell’s wife, although I very, very, very seriously doubt that. And herein lies the problem for Swalwell, if what she said Monday on Fox News is accurate.
“I do think he has serious criminal problems on his hand,” Luna told Jesse Watters. “And I do think he might end up in jail, Jesse.
“And if I could just share with you for a moment — not only did I receive forensic reporting showing that infamous video of him in that hotel room was indeed him, it was not AI-generated, but I’m also told that … more stuff is going to be dropping in the next 24 hours, and also, potentially, the individual that recorded that video in that hotel room, Jesse, was a female and she was underage.”
REP. ANNA PAULINA LUNA on Eric Swalwell allegations: “I do think he has serious criminal problems on his hands and I do think he might end up in jail.” https://t.co/NCmTtgskxK
— Fox News (@FoxNews) April 14, 2026
“That is very, very, very bad news,” Watters remarked.
Yeah, you don’t say.
See, despite the fact that there are receipts that link Swalwell to his accusers’ stories, it might be difficult for a district attorney to mount a prosecution if the defense is that the woman wasn’t too inebriated — and if she was, how was Swalwell to have known? How could she have known? This is a non-unique problem in sex-crime cases, as anyone who has watched more than a single episode of the 238 different permutations of “Law & Order” will tell you.
If that were all, it could mean Eric Swalwell could go away for a few years — or, heck, just months, like Chris Cuomo did before resuming his grift — and be back with a new gig and no criminal record.
However, the word “underage” removes complications from sex crime charges in an awful hurry, as Anthony “Carlos Danger” Weiner can attest to. And, if this is true, there’s likely metadata in that recording that could tie it to someone who can share a bit more about just what happened.
Naturally, a lot in the Swalwell scandal falls under the “big if true” banner. Enough is true that not only is he out of the governor’s race, he’s out of Congress, period, and he’s got people in the media saying that this was an open secret for years. If he was that indiscreet, at the very least, it’s within the realm of possibility that underage individuals were involved here.
When that “more stuff [that] is going to be dropping” drops, as Rep. Luna says it will, it’s probably going to mean the week ahead is even worse than the weekend was for Eric. That’s saying something.
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