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It Was 'Easier To Organize an Abortion for My Child Than It Was To Find Proper Care To Honor My Pregnancy'

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The past two days, my newsfeed has been flooded about legislation passing third-term abortions. I feel compelled to share.

I became pregnant after just getting engaged. When I found this out, my world as I knew it crumbled.

Shame overtook me. I went in for a 6-week ultrasound, not believing I was pregnant. The technician found a heartbeat. At just 6 weeks.

Her only comment was “That’s one strong heart in there.” Little did I know how powerful those words would be.

One Mother's Heartbreaking Abortion Story: 'That Wasn't My Choice. I Had No Say'
Photo Credit: Hannah Sudlow
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Word slowly came out that I was pregnant. I wanted to hide, & I lived most of my pregnancy in hiding.

At this point, I’m 20 weeks along. My now husband, mom, & I went in for an anatomy ultrasound. I was quickly rushed to a maternal-fetal center. My stomach was scanned from 9 AM until 3 PM.

Finally, they told me “everything is wrong with this baby. You can’t keep her.

I had an amniocentesis & a few weeks later the results came back. Trisomy 18. The maternal-fetal doctor informed me that she was incompatible with life. She would not live.

I was also told that my OB was already informed of this information and scheduled my abortion.

How’s that for “my body my rules?” That wasn’t my choice. I had no say.

I called the doctor’s office. The man was a doctor I had never met. He had no idea what I believed.

After attempting to blurt words out between sobs & screams, he told me that I needed to “save my energy to take care of the child inside you.” The child he was trying to abort just hours before. They made me leave their practice.

I went 5 weeks without a provider. No one would take me.

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There is a great tragedy at hand when it was a thousand times easier to organize an abortion for my child than it was to find proper care to honor my pregnancy.

Finally, I found a doctor’s office that was willing to monitor and care for Evelyn.

One Mother's Heartbreaking Abortion Story: 'That Wasn't My Choice. I Had No Say'
Photo Credit: Hannah Sudlow

I don’t write this in condemnation, I have felt plenty of that by some through my journey. That is never my narrative.

I write this as someone that desperately needed God’s Grace over what led me to that place, and He graciously gave that to me. There is no condemnation in Christ. I write this to beg you to stand for life.

Psalm 139 says “For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully & wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well.” Every child. Every baby.

The moment we stop defending the weakest & most vulnerable in our society will be a complete tragedy. I will always share my story. I always stand in the gap. I will always choose life.

By the way, Evelyn lived. She’s now two years old.

This content was published with permission from the author, Hannah Sudlow, and first appeared on her Facebook page. She is the Founder and Executive Director of Evelyn’s Treehouse, a nonprofit that offers support and resources to families in the hospital after they have received a life-changing medical diagnosis for their child.

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