Tesla Wants You to Sit in 'a Wet Dumpster' While Waiting for Your Car to Charge

By Ryan Ledendecker October 17, 2022 at 2:57pm

Let me start by declaring that I do not own a Tesla, nor do I plan to own one in this lifetime.

However, I’ve always been fascinated by the Tesla culture and how the owners of such vehicles take their Tesla experience so seriously. Charging stations — their version of the gas station — are cropping up everywhere, and some are so insanely bizarre that they warrant media attention.

In August, Jalopnik writer Steve DaSilva penned a hilarious report on a new “Supercharger” station in Hilden, Germany. In addition to what seems like endless charging station ports, the facility has what’s called a Tesla “Super Pool,” which DaSilva hilariously described as something that resembles “a wet dumpster.”

His description of the so-called Super Pool is spot-on. And let’s be honest: If anything, it’s super weird. I’ve never desired a quick dip in a pool while filling up my truck at the local fuel stop.

Not once.

“The company calls it a swimming pool, and I call that generous,” DaSilva wrote.

“But this is no pool. Look at those corrugated sides, the ridge around the base. Look at the brackets on the bottom. This is a dumpster that someone cut in half and threw a hose into. Apparently it’s meant for four occupants, assuming there are four people who fit the cross section of ‘wealthy enough to own a Tesla’ and ‘likes to sit in wet dumpsters.'”

DaSilva took issue with the pool, as it truly resembles a large, roll-off dumpster — the type a person rents for a few days for a spring cleaning or construction project.

Would you swim in this 'pool'?

The narrator indicated in his video presentation that Tesla is officially responsible for installing the pool, noting that it can hold up to four people at a time. He added that the pool is powered by the facility’s solar panels, suggesting that the pool, or, as DaSilva calls it, the “wet dumpster,” is heated, too.

“If you want to get customers, you also need a Super Pool,” the video’s narrator added, as if gas stations have missed out on a game-changing marketing ploy to attract more customers.

You might be wondering (but probably not) how one gains access to the Super Pool. According to the narrator, “You just have to come here, show your Tesla that you’re actually charging, and then you can use the pool.”

What’s more, the video narrator explained that the Tesla Super Pool isn’t exclusively for Tesla owners. He clarified that bringing any electric vehicle to the Supercharging station will make one eligible for a dip in the heated dumpster pool.

According to Electrek, Tesla recently has invested heavily in adding amenities to its charging stations worldwide to keep customers occupied and coming back for more juice. That’s because charging an electric vehicle is a lengthier process compared to the few minutes it takes to fill up a gas tank.

Depending on the vehicle and charger type, it appears that it takes roughly 10 minutes to charge the average electric vehicle at a Supercharger station sufficiently.

The outlet noted that the Hilden Supercharger station is one of the largest of its kind in Germany, sporting “8 Superchargers up to 150kW and 32 Superchargers up to 250kW.”

Aside from the addition of the dumpster-like pool, it hosts multiple restaurants and other amenities to hold customers’ interest.

Call me old school, but the only thing I’m interested in when filling my gas tank is getting back on the road as soon as possible. I wish this weren’t the case, but I simply don’t have time to swim while fueling my vehicle.

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