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US Space Force Releases Its Camo, Explains Similarity to Army Gear

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The uniforms for the U.S. Space Force have been released and there are plenty of scoffers, because of course there are.

Part of the reason there are plenty of jokes, of course, has to do with the fact that the uniforms are camouflage. It looks similar to Army gear, which is curious when you consider the fact that there isn’t any foliage in space.

Here’s the first look at the uniforms from the official Twitter account of Space Force, posted  on Friday:

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Quoth the tweet: “The first #SpaceForce utility uniform nametapes have touched down in the Pentagon.”

And they look pretty tight, although there were plenty of people who had one issue with them: Namely, they looked like Army uniforms.

Thanks to social media, were now  all experts with advanced degrees in whatever we’re opining on direct from Facebook University, sometimes with advanced doctoral work at Instagram State, so critics didn’t bother actually asking any questions about why the Space Force uniforms used a camouflage pattern and looked similar to Army fatigues. The Twitterati were right and they knew it. Move straight to the LOLs.

Take a user identified as Matt Trainer, a cryptocurrency flogger who calls himself a “Futurist, Technologist, [and] Growth Hacker” and claims that “Earth is a realm” in his Twitter profile. He’s amassed over 17,000 followers there, a cohort presumably made up of people who think Joe Rogan doesn’t do enough drugs on his podcast.

Obviously, knowing there couldn’t be any plausible reason behind Space Force having camouflaged uniforms, he decided to offer his erudite analysis of the uniform:

I think he meant Williamstown Theatre Festival, right?

Anyhow, he was hardly alone in this. Vox writer Aaron Rupar made the inevitable “Idiocracy is a documentary” reference, which is about as aged an online retort as “… said no one ever.”

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“Idiocracy,” for the uninitiated, is a 2006 movie directed by “Office Space”/”Beavis and Butthead” auteur Mike Judge in which an average 21st century man is cryogenically frozen and wakes up centuries in the future, where idiots have outbred intelligent people and he’s now the smartest person on earth. It’s typically invoked by the kind of dullards who don’t realize they would be in on humanity’s genetic diminishing returns, not swimming against the current.

Here’s some more liberal derision:

Two things are conspicuously missing from all of these tweets: the word “why” and a question mark. Because, as it turns out, there’s a good reason for all of this:

“USSF is utilizing current Army/Air Force uniforms, saving costs of designing/producing a new one,” Space Force explained in a Twitter post.

Do you support the creation of Space Force?

“Members will look like their joint counterparts they’ll be working with, on the ground.”

Oh, right.

There’s no particularly good reason for Space Force to have different uniforms unless you really believe they’re trying to hide in the inky blackness from Russian R-7 rockets and Bond villain lasers — something that common sense probably would have dictated. If they needed to slip into the background undetected, it would be on this planet, not out in space or among the huge, pulsating neon dendrite-like flora that dot the surface of Zoltar-7.

But no. Instead of taking this into consideration or inquiring further, Facebook University graduates everywhere went straight for the snark. And thank Zoltar they did, otherwise I wouldn’t have been so entertained by the reaction to the new Space Force get-up.

This Twitterer pretty well summed up my thoughts on the matter:

Space Force seems to do this not infrequently, doesn’t it?

A more serious summation might come from Shelley Carbone, freelance defense reporter:

Given that we don’t even have a manned spacecraft at the moment, we’re not going to have too many people floating around in space. Even when we do perfect the TIE fighter, most of the Space Force will still be on the ground, and there’s no particular reason for its members to have different uniforms from the rest of the armed forces. Two minutes of thought would have resolved this.

Alas, that’s too long for people who need to deliver a sick burn now.

Remember, though, that sick burns are like fireworks: If you don’t exercise caution, a lot of the injuries end up being self-inflicted.

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C. Douglas Golden is a writer who splits his time between the United States and Southeast Asia. Specializing in political commentary and world affairs, he's written for Conservative Tribune and The Western Journal since 2014.
C. Douglas Golden is a writer who splits his time between the United States and Southeast Asia. Specializing in political commentary and world affairs, he's written for Conservative Tribune and The Western Journal since 2014. Aside from politics, he enjoys spending time with his wife, literature (especially British comic novels and modern Japanese lit), indie rock, coffee, Formula One and football (of both American and world varieties).
Birthplace
Morristown, New Jersey
Education
Catholic University of America
Languages Spoken
English, Spanish
Topics of Expertise
American Politics, World Politics, Culture




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