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Op-Ed

Leftist Judges Rule with a New Constitution - And It's Less Than 20 Words!

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Did you know that federal judges have given us a new U.S. Constitution? It’s true. We’ve had the old one for years, but its lengthy, over 4,000 words. More recently federal judges have discovered a new and “improved” Constitution, which is about 20 words long.

In the old version, words had specific meanings and they were used carefully. For example, the old Constitution has an article entitled “Article Six”, which talks about, among other things, “oaths” of office.

Although “Article Six” may sound like “Article Sixty” — and “oaths of office” may sound like “oafs of office,” under the old Constitution these words had different meanings.

Modern judges now understand this was foolishness. Under the new Constitution, six can indeed mean sixty, it all depends. If you don’t know how this works or if you haven’t seen a copy of the new Constitution I have included all of it, in full, in the next paragraph:

ARTICLE 1: Judges have the power to make things fair. ARTICLE 2: Judges also have the power to make things good and nice.

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That’s it. The judges see this as a tremendous improvement. It makes things simple. Congressmen can be ignored, as can senators. Even the president is just an impotent Twitter Tweeter. All power now resides with the judges, who are tasked with the solemn duty to make things fair — or good and nice, depending on the case.

For example, are the words “cross-dressing murderer” not mentioned in the old Constitution? No bother. They are certainly implied in the new version. This gives modern judges the power to order that a cross-dressing murderer, locked up in prison, is constitutionally entitled to a taxpayer-funded sex change operation.

How, you may ask? Why, under Article 1. Because it seems “fair” to the judge he has the power to order it. Or under Article 2, if the judge thinks it would be “good and nice.”

Not that there are no rules of English Construction in the new Constitution. No, no, no. That is certainly not the case.

Under Article 2 for example, a judge only has the power to order things that are “good AND nice.” If something is only “nice” the judge has no power to issue an order. Of course, he can still issue the same order under Article 1, but only if he thinks it is “fair.” So you see, there are rules of construction after all.

How does the new Constitution work with the old one? I shall explain. If a judge does not have the power to do something, such as banning guns, under the old Constitution, he may then get the power he needs under the new Constitution. But, if he does, he must then mumble some words from the OLD Constitution to justify his power grab.

Justice Breyer showed us how it’s done. He explained that the Second Amendment does not include “the right of an individual to keep a gun next to his bed.” Justice Breyer came to this conclusion under Article 2 of the new Constitution because he doesn’t think guns are “good and nice.” But he then had to mumble some words from the old Constitution about “militias.” And there you go. It’s done. He now has the power to prevent you from keeping a gun in your bedroom. It’s really quite simple.

That is how “Constitutional law” works today. A judge reaches a conclusion based on what he thinks is fair, or good and nice. Then he issues an order and he mumbles some words from the Old Constitution. Then it becomes the law.

Good Lord — these judges must think we are dumber than rocks! Sooner or later I hope we show them how wrong they are. I hope we prove that they are VERY wrong — and I hope we show them we are prepared to do something about it. I pray for the coming of that day. Until then, however, we the people are mere puppets. The judges are the puppet masters.

The views expressed in this opinion article are those of their author and are not necessarily either shared or endorsed by the owners of this website. If you are interested in contributing an Op-Ed to The Western Journal, you can learn about our submission guidelines and process here.

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Mike Weinberger is a retired attorney and businessman who served as president of the Lawyers Chapter of the Federalist Society in New York City in the 1980s. He now lives in Louisiana, where he founded the Home Defense Foundation (hdfnola.org) and co-founded the Committee for a Common Sense Judiciary (commonsensejudiciary.org).




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