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Commentary

Millennials Sell Everything to Buy Sailboat -- 2nd Day Out, It Was Underwater

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I used to have to say, with a certain degree of embarrassment, that I was indeed a millennial. An older millennial, sure, but I fit the mold.

I was recently informed, however, that certain older millennials fit into a new subcategory between Generation X and the millennials called the “Oregon Trail Generation” — so named because of the educational video game many of us played on our middle school’s well-worn Apple II’s. So now I go by that.

That long-winded preface is my way of distancing myself entirely from Tanner Broadwell and Nikki Walsh, two millennials who sold all their possessions so that they could live on a sailboat and sail around the world.

They then proceeded to sink that boat within two days.

According to their GoFundMe page (because of course they have a GoFundMe page), Captain Ahab and his girlfriend accounted it high time to get to sea as soon as they could, so they decided to unburden themselves of all their worldly possessions.

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“My boyfriend (Tanner, 26) and I (Nikki, 24) had planned for a year to buy a sail boat, live on it and sail to the carribean. (sic) Our future plans were to sail the world one day,” the page reads.

“We sold all of our belongings and car to buy our 28ft sailboat and moved into it with our 2 year old pug, Remy. We had been living on it for a year and were headed for a trip to Key West from Tarpon Springs Florida after working in a boat yard & delivering boats for a few months learning about the boating world. The next day we motored in to Johns Pass to anchor for the night and ran into a submerged object in the water and our dreams and hard work sank beneath us.”

TL;DR version for those of you probably not inclined to hear their excuses: They sank their boat in two days, likely due to their own incompetence.

According to the New York Post, the boat — christened the Lagniappe — is currently submerged off of Madeira Beach, Florida, after the incident last Wednesday.

Would you have donated to this GoFundMe campaign?

Walsh said they “were pretty prepared,” but the Post reported they “ran into trouble in a channel of water called John’s Pass, near Madeira Beach.”

“We thought the channel was where we were going, but it wasn’t,” Walsh said. Yes, I would say so.

Social media lit up with scorn.

But don’t worry, everyone’s OK! And they’re going to be able to raise it from the water! Provided you pay for it.

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“Walsh said raising the craft will cost at least $6,700,” the Post reported. “That’s a problem because the goofy globetrotters have no jobs and just $90 in cash.”

“We have a lot of family helping us, but it’s hard when you’ve lost everything,” Walsh said.

The original GoFundMe goal was $10,000; I’m guessing the extra $3,300 was either for repairs or to buy them some sense. However, proving that millennials are poor investors in both watercraft and crowdsourcing campaigns, the GoFundMe total for Walsh and Broadwell had exceeded $14,000 by Tuesday morning.

I suppose an extra $4,000 would help a couple with a sunken sailboat and $90 in cash, but I also think two steady jobs, a work ethic and a bit of mentoring would help a great deal more.

As for how the couple plans to get around the globe with no money, there were scanty details on how their Kerouac-by-the-sea adventures were going to manifest themselves.

I wouldn’t worry about sailing around the world, though. Set small, reasonable goals for yourself. Like only sinking the ship after three days once you get it repaired. As for me, I’ll stick to “Oregon Trail” for my adventuring. I’d prefer virtually dying of dysentery than actually dying of self-imposed poverty and/or the complete inability to navigate a boat.

Please like and share on Facebook and Twitter with your thoughts on this millennial couple.

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C. Douglas Golden is a writer who splits his time between the United States and Southeast Asia. Specializing in political commentary and world affairs, he's written for Conservative Tribune and The Western Journal since 2014.
C. Douglas Golden is a writer who splits his time between the United States and Southeast Asia. Specializing in political commentary and world affairs, he's written for Conservative Tribune and The Western Journal since 2014. Aside from politics, he enjoys spending time with his wife, literature (especially British comic novels and modern Japanese lit), indie rock, coffee, Formula One and football (of both American and world varieties).
Birthplace
Morristown, New Jersey
Education
Catholic University of America
Languages Spoken
English, Spanish
Topics of Expertise
American Politics, World Politics, Culture




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