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Watch: Comedian Rob Schneider Tees Off on 'COVID Fairy' Fauci During Standup Set

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In a standup routine that he posted Wednesday on the social media platform X, former “Saturday Night Live” star Rob Schneider presented his comedic take on the history of the COVID-19 response led by Dr. Anthony Fauci.

And from the moment he mentioned Fauci’s name, it was clear that the gloves were off.

As director of the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases and chief medical advisor to the president at the start of the pandemic in early 2020, Fauci was often the driving force behind the federal government’s medical guidance and protocols.

He became a divisive figure, with many Americans — especially Republicans — distrusting his advice, as shown by a Statista survey graph from September 2020.

Much of the controversy stemmed from what some people saw as ever-changing and arbitrary protocols.

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Schneider began his routine by telling a touching and seemingly unrelated story about his 6-year-old daughter’s recent tooth loss.

He recounted her excitement that the magical Tooth Fairy would inexplicably gift her with money in exchange for a tooth.

However, he noted that at only four years older, his 10-year-old was already “over it.”

Tired of the charade, his older child wanted to know, “How long are we going to have to put up with this s***?”

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Schneider went on to give a clearly tongue-in-cheek explanation to his older and wiser child.

“It’s a beautiful thing,” he said, “the idea that there is this entity, someone who does something really nice for you just because something fell out of your head, you know? It’s just a nice thing to have in the universe, you know? Let’s keep that going as long as we can.

“Because it’s nice to have something to believe in that’s not true, but you believe in it for as long as you can until you find out it’s just, you know, a lie.”

And he immediately made the connection clear to anyone who had not yet caught on.

“Tony Fauci, he was like the COVID fairy.”

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The audience instantly erupted with laughter.

Schneider then launched into a comical retelling of Fauci’s recommendations and retractions.

“‘You don’t have to wear a mask,'” he said in a Fauci-like voice. “‘It may make you feel better if you wear a mask, but they don’t really work. … We need to save the masks for the essential workers, because the virus can tell the difference between an essential worker and a piece of s*** like you people …’

“Two weeks later, ‘Everybody’s gotta wear a mask … Just cover your face with anything, it doesn’t matter. A tennis racket, a tennis shoe …’”

WARNING: The following video contains vulgar language that some viewers may find offensive.

Schneider then went through the history of vaccine protocol, beginning with the claims that vaccinated individuals could neither contract nor spread the virus, shortly followed by the admission that “you can still get it, you can still give it.”

“‘We might need to have a booster, but a booster’s not another shot … If it was a shot, we’d call it a shot,'” he said, imitating Fauci.

The crowd erupted again and again as Schneider spent the next two minutes verbally leaping from one COVID protocol to the next with increasing speed.

At the end of the clip, the comedian became serious just long enough to issue a challenge to Fauci and other health officials.

He asked in apparent exasperation, “Can we stop lying about this stuff, finally?”

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Aubrey Wursten is a prolific writer and political commentator. In addition to her day job, she enjoys writing for her satire site, reading dusty library books, and watching offbeat documentaries.
Aubrey Wursten is a prolific writer and political commentator. In addition to her day job, she enjoys writing for her satire site, reading dusty library books, and watching offbeat documentaries.




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